I am often amazed by smart people who think themselves nearly infallible because they know so much and try so hard. They are earnest. They are leaders. They believe very strongly in themselves and their judgment. I'm glad such people exist. Society needs people who take things seriously, work hard and think positively about themselves. My own personal inquiry about such people is, are they humble? The word humble is derived from humility, which is achieved through humiliation. That is, until you are personally humiliated and know what that feels like, you often lack humility and are therefore not at all humble. I can deal with smart, aggressive people who want to lead as long as there is an underlying element of humility. Makes them human. Some of it is also about empathy, of course. Putting yourself in the place of the followers. Again, being a good leader is often defined by how good a follower you were. You can empathize with those who must follow because you were once where they are and know how it feels. Those who would lead but have not followed and who would give orders to others but lack humility, make me very nervous. If you feel the same, read on.
I am an outstanding example of someone who has felt humiliation, early and often. My friends in grammar school held me up to a mirror whenever I would get so full of myself that I forgot to think about others. My parents didn't know they were suppose to make me feel special, so they often showed me how stupid I was acting. So that's probably where my humility comes from. I guess now you can say I want others to feel my pain. I have hundreds of examples of my own stupidity or ignorance running rampant but I want to share a particularly egregious example of ignorance rearing it's homely persona at a critical moment in my past. It's also funny.
I joined the Air Force in 1970. Went to Lackland AFB for basic training. Like every other budding airman there, I was challenged by the "confidence course." It was what used to be called an obstacle course but renamed after what it was supposed to instill in it's participants. The first week or two in, you went out to do the course and well, with little PT behind you, you struggled to complete the course and once in a while didn't finish a particular obstacle. After a few weeks of PT and running, you got in better shape and most everybody did much better on the second go round and did it much faster. It was a requirement to finish basic. You had to finish the course. Now to set up my personal challenge. Also at Lackland we enjoyed pretty decent chow at the chow hall (cafeteria style) and breakfast was always filled with a lot of choices. What we lacked was very long to eat but you learned to rush if you expected to eat very much. The morning of our second try at the confidence course, we were filled with eager anticipation. Most of my flight felt in much better shape and we knew the course better. Every morning after my first two weeks of acclimation, I had tried to take at least something different to try at the chow hall. Keep it interesting. This morning I selected a nice bowl of warm prunes to go with my eggs and toast. They were a bit weird but also kinda sweet and overall I liked them and ate them all and drank the juice. I had never experienced warm prunes before but my knowledge of the fruit was soon to be expanded. Before breakfast, we had been up since dawn, had done morning PT and were scheduled to arrive at the confidence course a little before 10:30AM. "Hurry up and wait" is the motto of the military and we marched quick time across base and out to the woods where the course was located to stand and wait. It was a decent march and got us quite warmed up. In prior summers at Lackland, they had killed a few recruits and we were wearing pith topis and carrying a canteen of water wherever we went. Lord knows what it cost the government when one of us died so we had to do our best to protect our benefactor whenever we could. Our road guards carried an extra canteen of salt tablets and passed them out twice a day. Once in a while somebody collapsed from the heat but it wasn't fatal, just life threatening. It was more an inconvenience, which they could tolerate. Screaming often ensued but that was clearly out of love. We stood at parade rest for a half hour because the schedule was falling behind. Perhaps some airman had to be hospitalized because they were allergic to tear gas. Who knows? What I did know, however, was the first rumblings of my bowels was occurring around the time we were originally due to take the course. After waiting another 15 minutes, I knew I was in serious, serious trouble. I wasn't able to stand still any longer, parade rest or no. Something was coming down the old alimentary canal and there was no stopping it. We were told to get ready as we were going to go on the course at any time. I was not going to be able to run and jump and scale anything with the explosive gas I was experiencing and there was no point in telling anybody, they'd just scream at me. I just took off toward the nearest stand of trees to let nature take it's course and miracle of miracles there was an old bathroom no longer in use, just behind the trees. It was made of concrete blocks with two stalls, still with conveniences. It was overgrown, foul and dirty and awful but it looked like a little bit of heaven to me. I exploded into the old john and sacrificed a handkerchief and ran like a fool back to where my flight had been and found they had moved up significantly and was now queued up to be next in line to tackle the course. At that moment I realized I had made a very stupid mistake to sample a completely new food before taking on a difficult course. If I couldn't complete it, at a minimum it would set me back a week in training. Luck had seen me through it. It was, however, yet another reason to be humble. I didn't embrace the experience but I learned from it. And sometime in the future, if you grow tired of a co-worker who can't seem to empathize with others or manage to show any humility, try to encourage them to have a large, warm bowl of prunes the morning before your next important meeting. Worked for me.
I am an outstanding example of someone who has felt humiliation, early and often. My friends in grammar school held me up to a mirror whenever I would get so full of myself that I forgot to think about others. My parents didn't know they were suppose to make me feel special, so they often showed me how stupid I was acting. So that's probably where my humility comes from. I guess now you can say I want others to feel my pain. I have hundreds of examples of my own stupidity or ignorance running rampant but I want to share a particularly egregious example of ignorance rearing it's homely persona at a critical moment in my past. It's also funny.
I joined the Air Force in 1970. Went to Lackland AFB for basic training. Like every other budding airman there, I was challenged by the "confidence course." It was what used to be called an obstacle course but renamed after what it was supposed to instill in it's participants. The first week or two in, you went out to do the course and well, with little PT behind you, you struggled to complete the course and once in a while didn't finish a particular obstacle. After a few weeks of PT and running, you got in better shape and most everybody did much better on the second go round and did it much faster. It was a requirement to finish basic. You had to finish the course. Now to set up my personal challenge. Also at Lackland we enjoyed pretty decent chow at the chow hall (cafeteria style) and breakfast was always filled with a lot of choices. What we lacked was very long to eat but you learned to rush if you expected to eat very much. The morning of our second try at the confidence course, we were filled with eager anticipation. Most of my flight felt in much better shape and we knew the course better. Every morning after my first two weeks of acclimation, I had tried to take at least something different to try at the chow hall. Keep it interesting. This morning I selected a nice bowl of warm prunes to go with my eggs and toast. They were a bit weird but also kinda sweet and overall I liked them and ate them all and drank the juice. I had never experienced warm prunes before but my knowledge of the fruit was soon to be expanded. Before breakfast, we had been up since dawn, had done morning PT and were scheduled to arrive at the confidence course a little before 10:30AM. "Hurry up and wait" is the motto of the military and we marched quick time across base and out to the woods where the course was located to stand and wait. It was a decent march and got us quite warmed up. In prior summers at Lackland, they had killed a few recruits and we were wearing pith topis and carrying a canteen of water wherever we went. Lord knows what it cost the government when one of us died so we had to do our best to protect our benefactor whenever we could. Our road guards carried an extra canteen of salt tablets and passed them out twice a day. Once in a while somebody collapsed from the heat but it wasn't fatal, just life threatening. It was more an inconvenience, which they could tolerate. Screaming often ensued but that was clearly out of love. We stood at parade rest for a half hour because the schedule was falling behind. Perhaps some airman had to be hospitalized because they were allergic to tear gas. Who knows? What I did know, however, was the first rumblings of my bowels was occurring around the time we were originally due to take the course. After waiting another 15 minutes, I knew I was in serious, serious trouble. I wasn't able to stand still any longer, parade rest or no. Something was coming down the old alimentary canal and there was no stopping it. We were told to get ready as we were going to go on the course at any time. I was not going to be able to run and jump and scale anything with the explosive gas I was experiencing and there was no point in telling anybody, they'd just scream at me. I just took off toward the nearest stand of trees to let nature take it's course and miracle of miracles there was an old bathroom no longer in use, just behind the trees. It was made of concrete blocks with two stalls, still with conveniences. It was overgrown, foul and dirty and awful but it looked like a little bit of heaven to me. I exploded into the old john and sacrificed a handkerchief and ran like a fool back to where my flight had been and found they had moved up significantly and was now queued up to be next in line to tackle the course. At that moment I realized I had made a very stupid mistake to sample a completely new food before taking on a difficult course. If I couldn't complete it, at a minimum it would set me back a week in training. Luck had seen me through it. It was, however, yet another reason to be humble. I didn't embrace the experience but I learned from it. And sometime in the future, if you grow tired of a co-worker who can't seem to empathize with others or manage to show any humility, try to encourage them to have a large, warm bowl of prunes the morning before your next important meeting. Worked for me.
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